The "Talk"

It is the most dreaded conversation for parents, but for me, it was one that I could not even fathom having with my girls anytime in the near future…BUT it happened.  Today.  In the car. As I was driving them to their new school.  Not the most ideal location, but I had an opportunity where they couldn’t get away from me, and the situation presented itself to me last night after over hearing a conversation they were having with their younger cousins…que the real awkwardness.
Rewind to last night when, as I did laundry in one room, I over heard the girls talking about an album cover on my itunes (“Sex in the City”).  One of them says, “We can’t listen to that, it has a bad word in it.”
Oh no!  Baby Girl 2 to Baby Girl 1, “You tell them what the bad word is.” Oh heck no! This is NOT happening.  I’m not ready! “S.E.X.,” says Baby Girl 1.  NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Quickly I give them all the five minute warning and tell the cousins to scoot it back down to their house.
Mentally not ready for what lay ahead of me, I got the girls to go to bed and put and end to ANY conversation period!
Fast forward to this morning riding to the new school.  (Again, I realize this is not the most opportune time, but what the heck, I’ll give it a go.)  My main concern is that my daughters feel like they can come to us about ANYTHING.  I want the lines of communication to be completely open.
So, I looked at my two little innocent angels in the very back of my van who singing along to Radio Disney and having a grand ole time when I decide to throw down the gauntlet.  Turn off the radio only to receive looks of what the hell are you doing from the back seat. I ask them about the conversation they were having with their cousins the night before and if they new what that word meant.  Baby Girl 2 (middle child), who had been looking at me very intently the whole time slowly eases back behind the seat in front of her removing herself from my sight line.  “Yes”, says Baby Girl 1, “It’s when people do stuff together.  A guy and girl sleep together.”
“Where did you hear about this?”, I ask.  Are you ready for this????
“At Grandmama’s house, it was on the 7th Heaven tv show.” (That sound you heard was me being written out of my mother’s will for putting this out there for anyone and everyone to see.)
Apparently, 7th Heaven did a good and wholesome job in one of the later episodes with the “talk”.   But if that doesn’t work, try this one…
http://www.ted.com/talks/julia_sweeney_has_the_talk.htm
The jury is still out, but I think I faired better than Ms. Sweeney! Poor gal!  ONLY ANSWER THE QUESTIONS THEY ASK DO NOT PROVIDE ANYMORE INFORMATION THAN THAT!!

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